Friday, December 31, 2010

End of year rituals

In my family, we have a tradition to go to the beach and watch the last sunset of the year on December 31st. It's a wonderful way to reflect on all the things that had happened throughout the year, and a nice opportunity to kinda finalize the new year's resolution list.

Here's what the last sunset of 2010 looked like from Huntington Beach :)
Amazing, isn't it?

Monday, December 20, 2010

The rain and the wind and the confession.

I went to confession tonight, and the priest said that I don't need to do penance because I came despite having to brave the rain and wind. What more can I ask from the Lord who has forgiven my sin and not making me pay for anything in return? Such unconditional love, such merciful God.  I feel as though a load of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. It's been about 3 years since I went to confession. Even though I felt queasy and nauseous before the confession, I felt a wave of relief and at peace after the whole thing is done. Needless to say, I promised to be a better person and to not do all those bad things that I did before.

It's 5 days before Christmas, and I feel like I'm finally ready to welcome baby Jesus into my heart.

Now I Know

School is out, work is enjoyable, life is wonderful and God is good.

I woke up this morning with no worry in my mind for the first time. I'm done with the finals, and for some reason, I can accept that I have done my best and whatever the outcome, I'll be alright with it. I don't have a full-time job, but that's ok. My partnership with my sister is going good. She's so smart and professional. I need to do a better job in helping her out. My relationship with family and friends is warm and comforting. Even though I don't own a lot, I feel so blessed with countless, invaluable, immaterial things that only can be found if you just let go of your worries and just live.

I remember six years ago, crying my eyes out while saying goodbye to the life I knew back in college. Pursuing the 'American dream', I packed my two suitcases and three boxes and drove from Indiana to LA. I didn't have a place to live yet at the time, but my parents (who were along for the journey and very supportive) were optimistic and very supportive. With lots of prayers and luck, my friend found me a place to live when we were just a day away from arriving in LA. Six years later, here I am. I am still pursuing the dream, but slowly I'm realizing that I am actually already living the dream. Who would've thought that the unsure, scared 21 year old girl, would end up like this? With time I realize that the best things in life is indeed free: the smell of pine trees in the woods after a weekend of non-stop rain, the good morning kiss from a person who loves you unconditionally, even if you don't have a job. Stuff like this, you know?

This Christmas season, I would like to wish you all the true peace and joy that Christmas means to bring. Live life to the fullest. Give without expecting anything back. Love earnestly.